 |
| Play poker at 888poker! |
I’m not quite sure what compelled me to do this top-10. I myself am not massively fashion concious and I usually opt for a jeans and shirt combo or something similar. I guess some footballers have that same philosophy, whereas some prefer to be outrageous. Have a look anyway and please comment and add your own fashion style files, if that is something you enjoy doing….
10. The Dad
Micky-o has just thought of a fantastic Dad joke…
You no longer care, you get free clothes from my boot’s company and you plan to wear them with a pair of jeans. As for hair, I will leave it alone thank-you-very-much.
Those Rocking the look: Michael Owen
9. Ready for football, all the time
Dawson struggling with basic grade 2 maths…
Messi wearing a green polo neck to an award ceremony…classy.
Like the dad, this look involves very little commitment. Understandably, joggers and a t-shirt make sense if you’re on the way to training, but all the time? Come on now; put a little more effort into your appearance fella!
What to know what players are about to be ‘the next big thing’? Well this list aims to educate you in that department as I take a look at ten players destined for great things. So sit back, enjoy and watch this space…
10. Mario Götze, Dortmund and Germany
One of the many shining lights in Dortmund’s season, eighteen year old, Gotze has already shown world-class potential. With one cap to his name, Mario recently gained a colossal vote of confidence from German Football Association’s technical director Matthias Sammer who called him; “one of the best talents that we’ve ever had”.
He is yet another player added to the long list of young and up-and-coming players to come out of the German youth system – which would suggest that in a few years their national side might be a world beater.
Firstly, I propose a question: Do you burst out in laughter when you see that a footballer has written off their 240k sports car? Firstly, I might add, that they are safe and with their health and well-being still intact. So it’s okay, laugh, lap it up, you know you want too…
10. David Bentley
The Spurs midfielder, now on-loan at Birmingham, had his crash after a Jet gig – I know, what bad taste he has. Obviously, had to have a few bevies, but forgot he was driving home that night. Inebriated on his return journey he lost control and bent his 90k porshe around a lamppost. Cue the headlines: ‘Bent it like Beckham’ – The Sun and ‘Bentley hits the post’ – The Mirror. As well as ’A driving ban’ – The Police. Nice one captain dickhead, I joke, he’ll never be a captain.
9. Kieron Dyer
For this week’s top 10 we have for you10 of the worst badges you are likely to see on a football shirt. Some rude, some crude, and some that are just, well, shit!
10. Wycombe Wanderers
A swan that’s into bondage? Come on now Wanderers, we don’t wanna see some saucy bird who loves her whips and chains.
9. AS Bari
I feel hungry… and I can’t figure out why, infact I have got this craving for some cornflakes….strange.
8. Sampdoria
This was based on a sailor in profile mode. Well they failed at that, it looks like a a Sherlock homes’ dog. Bow, wow, wow.
7. SS Manfredonia Calcio
“Aww isn’t that cute, a baby dolphin playing football” – NO NO NO!!
6. Columbus Crew
The crew’s badge is basically three men who are potentially fireman strippers. If this was not on a football shirt you would think that it would make a great advert for a hen night.
Fact: Hitler was a Shalke fan. Today I delve into the world of celebriti, with a set of ten fans in mid that epitomise global stardom. Whether they are an actor, a musician, or, well – that’s all I have on here actually – they all share a ‘love’ for a certain team in England, or claim to at least.
10. Morrissey (Millwall or West Ham)
The former Smiths lead singer, may not be the most decorated A-lister on this list, but it is the irony that intrigues me. Morrissey is of course a liberal thinker, with non-violent liberal ideologies – which becomes clear when you listen to his music. Meat might be murder, but going to a Millwall game if you are, say, wearing a West Ham shirt, could see the same fate.
I have no doubt that the story concerning Morrissey wearing a Millwall shirt, with mobster on the back is more satirical, if not then a mere joke. You never know with him sometimes.
Here lies a countdown of the ten worst Premiership football Shirts – From 1992 till 2010….
Every weekend men and women flock to stadiums in their drones, wearing brightly coloured uniforms as they march the street, singing their war songs before there side battles against an opposing army. It is a self-inflicted conscription, once the shirt if lifted upon our heads, our side is chosen: it’s war. Oh, and kit makers, please resist from making us look like crap.
10. Everton, 2010-11
When Everton’s bright pink strip first came out I was shocked. The design itself is great, but it’s bright pink, and it’s just too much for me, and I’m sure a few others, to handle. A powder pink, a-la-Palermo colour would have made this a classic.
9. Newcastle United, 1997-98
Football chants are the metaphoric glue that bonds fans together in banter. For some players these are songs praising their talent, for others, well, it’s best not to go there. Unfortunately there are some offensive corkers we had to leave out, but the ones we left in are equally class. Enjoy!!
10. This chat was sung by Arsenal fans in a 2009 Carling Cup tie. The receiver: Andriy Voronin – then of Liverpool
You’re just a fat Robbie Savage!
9. This one is in reference to Jaime Carragher’s dad being banned from football stadia after being arrested for being drunk at a football match…
He’s red, He’s sound, He’s banned from every ground, Carra’s dad, Carra’s dad
8. A great use of a classic song I might add, this one created by Stenhousemuir supporters to midfielder Robert Love, to the tune of Joy Division’s Love Will Tear Us Apart.
There comes a time in a footballers life when he must put his feet up and take a rest. Usually, this happens when they turn 35 , but for some, there resting is done between the 1st and 70th minute of a game and if they are lucky, the whole 90 minutes plus stoppages…I’m talking, of course, about bench-warmers.
10 Jermaine Jenas (Tottenham)
Not playing? Might as well get a tattoo
Jermaine Jenas has had stints at Nottingham Forrest, Newcastle United and now Tottenham Hostspur.
Unfortunately, Jenas’ games for the London club are diminishing, as the midfielder slowly turns from a starter into a squad player. Jenas still has dreams of adding to his 21 England caps – this won’t happen from the bench.
9. Ryan Babel (Liverpool)
Not playing? Might as well photoshop Webb in a man yoo shirt
Ryan Babel gets so bored of being benched at Liverpool that he has turned to Twitter for some sort of recognition.
As promised in my Strike Partnership article (Although not to the most pinpoint time schedule) here are my top ten defensive pairings in Premiership History.
10. David Weir and Alan Stubbs
Stubbs and Weir defied all odds in the 2004-05 season when relegation candidates, Everton, qualified for the Champion’s League. The two performed heroically, and had done for many years previously, at a time when Everton enjoyed flirting with relegation. But it was this season that highlighted that they were, in fact, top defenders.
9. Roger Johnson and Scott Dann
In 2009-10 these two were the foundation of the Birmingham team. Without their fantastic defensive partnership the Midlands side may not have stayed in the Premiership last season, nor would they have made it there in the first place.
Usually, pundits such as Mark Lawrenson points towards a striker as the key to Premiership survival, but in this case two centre backs and two good hands from Joe Hart, were all that was needed.
I hope everyone had a great new year, but now there is work to be done and New Year’s Resolutions to be kept – especially for Premiership sides and footballers…
10. Come to the realisation that you are not a ‘gangsta’, far from it, you are a footballer
Visually we have your boy, Ferdinand and Nigel Reo Cooker to prove my point.
9. Buy a coat that fits
For years Mr. Wenger has been gracing our sidelines with a club coat ten times his size. 2011 should finally be the year that he should drop from an xxl to probably a medium…I guess?
8. Cut down on the Jaffa Cakes at half time
Notoriously Rio Ferdinand loves a few half time Jaffa cakes to raise his energy levels. However, in the last year or so his intake has increased and he has paid the price with an extended period on the sidelines.
Strike partners have always been an important part of the English game and this week we celebrate ten of the best duos to grace the Premiership…
10. Alan Shearer and Les Ferdinand (Newcastle) – Overall 28/ 21
97/98 – 28 and 21 = 49 goals
(In all competitions- applies to all)
Unfortunately, Shearer and Ferdinand only played with each other for one season but in that short amount of time they clicked. With a total of 49 goals in one season just imagine what they could have done in 98/99.
9. Jurgen Klinsmann and Teddy Sheringham (Spurs) – Overall 29/ 23
In truth, most of us are useless at buying presents for those around us. So ITS we have tried to reduce the burden, offering you our top ten gifts that are sure to delight your friend or loved one who just so happens to happens to like football…
10. A football pump or inflation needles
There is nothing worse than going to the park with a flat ball. So make sure that this xmas you stock up to avoid any disappointment. – £4.99 @ SportsDirect
9. Soccernomics: Why England Lose
Simon Kuper and Stefan Szymanski love delving into football’s great debates. Why do England like losing?, why do Newcastle buy the wrong players?, why do Brazil and Germany always win?… these questions are answered in this compelling book. – Why England Loose – £4.97 @ Amazon
Recent Comments