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Areselona: The Movie

So, have any of you lot watched a chick flick? No? Well you are a fucking liar. You’re on a football site – so you must, therefore, like football – and like most of us, you probably watched, over the last two weeks, snipits of, what is, essentially, a film made for a girl, or, what the sporting community like to call it…barca-fucking-lona. Yes, it starts with the nice guy, losing. Thee nice guy of football, on it’s knees after falling to thr might of an Italian. A sexy ... Continue Reading →

Crap Chant Half-Hour: The FA Cup Upsets

  I watched some FA cup upsets, I wrote some chants… because I can okay.    Music Cup The FA cup is magic like Johnson* So lets go listen to some MARK RONSON Oh Stop me, oh oh oooh stop me ** ..because Oldham have just beat the scourers by two to three.   Notes  *Not Bradley of Norwich, the basketball guy **I would recommend singing the line of the Mark Ronson song ‘Stop me’   Cooking up somethin’  Deeelia* your breaking my heart, your shaking my ... Continue Reading →

XI series: Sexual Innuendo XI

GK: Fabian Assmann
 This Argentine goalkeeper, who currently plays for Independiente, has been given the nickname Billy Gun.  (by me) LB: Jullian Dicks “Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they’ve got eleven Dicks on the field.” – Sometimes football can be a sausage factory. RB:Rod Fanni Unflappable French right back for Olympique de Marseille has impressed in recent years. It’s no wonder that Wigan, Sunderland and Newcastle have been eyeing up ... Continue Reading →

In Awe of David Moyes

Year after year Everton defy the odds with a team thin on the ground. But now they seem to have a side that is strong and settled. Can this be the year that David Moyes and the Toffees finally win the silverware they truly desire.  Starting from the back and based on last year’s record Everton had the third best defence in the division. Their defensive unit – for the most part has remained consistent with Howard in goal, Baines left, Neville or Hibert right and Distan, Jagielka or Heitinga ... Continue Reading →

Fantasy Football 2012/13 guide: Defenders

Like it or lump it, defenders are an important part of any fantasy football team – even if you, like most managers, decide to leave just three at the back… Last season the defensive top scorers couldn’t have been more obvious. Patrice Evra- despite having a poor season by his standards – came out top after playing almost every game, scoring points from a large amount of clean sheets as well as generous handful of assists typical of a modern full-back. Other full-back-cum-wing-backs ... Continue Reading →

Fantasy Football 2012/13 Guide: Goalkeepers

With the Premier League football season only weeks away it’s time that we started to look at the Fantasy Football team again. We start with recommended goalkeepers… With a total of 166 points, Joe Hart  was the leading Premiership goalkeeper last season. This year it’s likely that he’ll come out top dog again. Arguably, his rivals for clean sheets at the top of the League will be Manchester United’s David De Gea (134)*, Chelsea’s Petr Cech (127) and Arsenal’s ... Continue Reading →

Dan Warren’s ‘England Will Win Euro 2008′ revisited in 2012

So to the old. Today, I have decided to revisit Dan Warren’s England’s Euro 2008 winning side 9 years after the piece was first written (find it here) Tactics: A 5-1-2-2 Do me a favour Warren! Goalkeeper Prediction’s: “Chris Kirkland, 21 now, will be the world’s finest goalkeeper by 2008″ in 2012: He’s slumming it at Championship new boys Sheffield United after shadowing at Wigan. Defence Predictions: “Brothers, and Rio and Anton Ferdinand will ... Continue Reading →

Never Forget: Fulham’s 2008 Great Escape

69 Minutes gone and Fulham are 2-0 to Manchester City on the 16th of April 2008. As it stands Fulham’s destiny next season is the Championship… After a shocking 12 Months as April 2008 approached. Fulham find themselves with a record of only four home wins, zero away wins and three points from safety. A priceless away win against relegation rivals Birmingham early in the Month – with goals from McBride and Nevland, gave them a lifeline… But this was thrown away a week later ... Continue Reading →

PSG: Zlatan and Thiago shown the Money

The saying “everyone can be bought at the right price” has never sung truer as  Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Thiago Silva make the move to PSG. The two player will earn a staggering average wage of 14 Million euros a year each, with AC Milan set to earn up to 70 Million for their troubles. They join new signing Marco Verratti who joined for 12 Million euros today, as well as Ezeqiel Lavezzi who joined the club last month. PSG, under the leadership of Carlo Ancelotti will now be overwhelming ... Continue Reading →

Pre-season Analysis: Liverpool

Usually when the football season is over the void tends to be filled by days in the park, music festivals, and beer-garden jollies. But instead life has been rather glum while Britain has had it’s rainiest summer ever. Hopefully me writing this and you reading this will pose as a distraction Stangely this year; Football: I don’t want to get over you  So Liverpool. New manager. New players. New philosophy. It’s likely Kenny’s 3-5-1-1 or 4-4-1-1 will be replaced by Brendan ... Continue Reading →

The ITS European Transfer Update…

For those who miss out on transfers, here’s the essential ITS rundown… Sometimes, when the football season comes to an end your eyes seems to wander to other sports…As a result, when all teams in Europe kick off in August you suddenly burst out the line; “what the hell Player Z plays for Team Y now! When did that happen?!” – it’s likely you will feel inferior to your peers as the European football expert that you think you are. We want you to keep your dignity ... Continue Reading →

Should More English Players go Abroad?

The English Premiership is truly global league. Their are, in fact,  62 different nationalities represented within a mere 50,000 sq Miles. But in the other 5,730,000 sq Miles, only 35 English players, not including Scotland, are playing abroad.  The questions is; But why? Why are so many English footballers put off by the prospect of adding the experience of more technical leagues in Spain and Italy? Spanish, French and Italian players have always jumped at the chance of playing in the more phisical ... Continue Reading →